Ever have one of those mornings?

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Ram Quixote

Ram Quixote

Knight Errant
Joined
Jul 10, 2010
Messages
2,923
Name
Tim
It began with my wife calling me because she forgot something (she leaves for work before me) and she needed me to bring it to her at work. There goes my routine.

So I bring her the item, and now I'm going to be late for work. So I jump back in my car and hurry to the nearest freeway onramp. I'm just about to merge with rush hour traffic when I look to my left. INSIDE the front driver's side window less than a foot from my face is a complete web with a spider that I swear is bigger than a half-dollar.

Now I'm freaking, 'cause I'm a bit of an arachnophobe. With one eye I'm keeping track of traffic while the other is looking to the side of the road to see if I can pull over. Meanwhile my right hand is reaching for something to squish the fucker. It finds a paper towel. Now my focus turns to the spider as my right hand reaches across to the window and I press the towel against the glass. The spider slips around the side and I drop the towel on the floor and begin stomping with my left foot.

At this point I realize I'm holding up traffic and race forward to merge into traffic, all the while stomping with my left foot. Now I'm in rush hour traffic, adrenaline pumping because I can't tell if I killed it or not, and trying not to kill myself.

I stomp the paper towel some more, because that's the only target I can see. Finally, I reach down and pick up the towel and see that I won. But it's not over. I'm still trying to calm down.

I make it to work without a scratch on the car, then wipe down the window. My hand is just slightly shaking. That's about the time that a seagull poops on the hood of my car.
 
Just try to stay away from sharp objects for the rest of the day man. Good luck. :sly:
 
Thank God you killed it. I was certain you were going to look at the paper towel only to find no spider at all.

You may be a bit of an arachniphobe... I'm full blown fucking terrified.

Glad you got it. I was ready to panic.
 
Damn I wish that was on YouTube. :lol:
 
X said:
Damn I wish that was on YouTube. :lol:
Click to expand...


+1 :lmao:

That was a pretty funny story. I also am a bit of an arachnophobe so I can relate.
 
X said:
Damn I wish that was on YouTube. :lol:
Click to expand...
Too bad I don't have one of those Google glasses. Or whatever they call them.

So, I go out to lunch everyday. But that means I have to get back in my car. *sigh* It's gonna be a while before I feel comfortable again.
 
I'm not afraid of bugs or spiders, but last year while driving I was stopped at a light and a big spider crawled on my arm and it scared the piss out of me. I have no idea how it got in my car, but my girlfriend thought it was hilarious.
 
I'm definitely not a fan of spiders. There are brown recluse spiders down here (lots), and if they sink their tiny little fangs in you, it could cause all kinds of problems. And I when I used to work in the elevator trade, they were freaking EVERYWHERE when we went inside the hoistways. A friend of mine got bit once, and ended up in the hospital. I mean, all you have to do is hit google images with "Brown recluse bite" and see for yourself.

Those things suck.
 
X said:
I mean, all you have to do is hit google images with "Brown recluse bite" and see for yourself.

Those things suck.
Click to expand...

Just did that ^. All i can say is...

HOLY SHYTE!! why did i do that, i knew it was gonna be awful but i did it anyway. That is some nasty shyte, i freaking HATE spiders aswell, who would have thought something so small could cause such a large wound...
I hate spiders...(if i hadnt made that clear)
 
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TRJUAaQ2WU[/youtube]
 
X said:
I'm definitely not a fan of spiders. There are brown recluse spiders down here (lots), and if they sink their tiny little fangs in you, it could cause all kinds of problems. And I when I used to work in the elevator trade, they were freaking EVERYWHERE when we went inside the hoistways. A friend of mine got bit once, and ended up in the hospital. I mean, all you have to do is hit google images with "Brown recluse bite" and see for yourself.

Those things suck.
Click to expand...

Yeah - FUCK spiders. I know. I used to be one of those that figured they killed a lot of bugs and stuff but last year I got bit right in the middle of my spine by some kind of spider - don't know what kind cuz we have a shitload of them here too. But at first there were just a couple little fang marks on my back that looked like a tiny snake bit me. A couple days later it turned black around them, then it started to ooze and get bruised looking around it. A few days later, the "bruised" spot was about 2" across and the center started to get black and necrotic and a hole about the size of a small marble developed. It itched and burned like crazy. I talked to a doctor friend of ours and he said there wasn't much to do about it but keep it clean and bandaged. That fucking sore took over eight months just to stop oozing and dry up. I still have a nasty scar above my back bone.

Bottom line - I kill every spider I see now unless it is in the wild. I stay calm around the fuckers except that I make sure death is a comin'.
 
The moment that Seagull splatted your car, you're thoughts must have been...."Well it can only get better from here on out"
 
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