AP may have abused another 4 yr old son

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No, because the way I look at it, is that if a teacher today or a daycare nanny or what have you, disciplines your kid the way you do (corporal punishment) you be damn sure that individual would be charged with child abuse. People claim right to punish their kid how they see fit, but damn if someone else does the same thing to your kid, you get all up in arms.

Violence is violence.

It's not the same thing. They don't have the special relationship that affords them the right to punish in that way. For example, if your 16 year old kid takes your car without your knowledge and you catch them...you wouldn't have them charged with a crime like you would if a random 16 year old kid takes your car without your knowledge?

I see nothing wrong with a parent using corporal punishment. My parents used it on me. Hell, my mother...who has the patience of a saint...slapped my older brother across the face when we were in our early teen years. She still regrets it to this day but I'd be lying if I said he didn't deserve it. And you better bet that stubborn mofo learned his lesson.
 
I see nothing wrong with a parent using corporal punishment.
You might rethink that stance when you have kids of your own.
And I hope you do. You're far too smart to debase yourself like that.
 
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You might rethink that stance when you have kids of your own.
And I hope you do. You're far too smart to debase yourself like that.

Different strokes for different folks. It worked on me and I harbor no grudges over it. My parents made the right call in doing it. I learned my lesson. If I have to do it to my kids, it'll have to be done. Last resort type punishment.
 
It's not the same thing. They don't have the special relationship that affords them the right to punish in that way. For example, if your 16 year old kid takes your car without your knowledge and you catch them...you wouldn't have them charged with a crime like you would if a random 16 year old kid takes your car without your knowledge?

I see nothing wrong with a parent using corporal punishment. My parents used it on me. Hell, my mother...who has the patience of a saint...slapped my older brother across the face when we were in our early teen years. She still regrets it to this day but I'd be lying if I said he didn't deserve it. And you better bet that stubborn mofo learned his lesson.
In some states you can't charge them with a crime. If your kid takes your car it isn't considered theft because they obviously intend to come back. Again, in SOME states. Just a fun fact.
 
Different strokes for different folks. It worked on me and I harbor no grudges over it. My parents made the right call in doing it. I learned my lesson. If I have to do it to my kids, it'll have to be done. Last resort type punishment.

Dude, you're a really intelligent guy. Just try to reason with your kids. You don't have to be their friend, nor do you tell them that it's okay for them to do that...but just try to explain things in a way that they can understand.
 
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Dude, you're a really intelligent guy. Just try to reason with your kids. You don't have to be their friend, nor do you tell them that it's okay for them to do that...but just try to explain things in a way that they can understand.

I will certainly make my best attempt at it.
 
Different strokes for different folks. It worked on me and I harbor no grudges over it. My parents made the right call in doing it. I learned my lesson. If I have to do it to my kids, it'll have to be done. Last resort type punishment.
Certainly your prerogative. I just have a suspicion that once you have kids of your own, you'll not only be able to break the trend, but want to.
 
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I will certainly make my best attempt at it.

The bottom line for me is when is hitting the best or only answer? I think the answer is never. It may do the job and it's sure easier than following through on punishments and teaching, but it's never the best or only answer IMHO.
 
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My dad just yelled really loud. It worked for the most part. Its not his fault im still an asshole lol
 
The bottom line for me is when is hitting the best or only answer? I think the answer is never. It may do the job and it's sure easier than following through on punishments and teaching, but it's never the best or only answer IMHO.

Usually its a temporary solution that doesn't really fix much over the long term. The thing children learn most from being hit is that its okay to hit children/others to attempt to get a certain response. Especially younger children, often they don't really know why they get hit, so they don't understand why they should or shouldn't do things.
 
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I spanked my oldest daughter once, when she was 8yrs old, and I still feel bad about it.. .20yrs later :)